Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
