Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
