The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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