I'm gonna have a badass scar
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Randomize