Three words: puerto rican gang bang
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize