Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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