haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize