She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
