Texts From Last Night

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  (305): View more from Florida

  I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x

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  (305): I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x http://tfl.nu/g18f
  Replies (110) Good night (1285) Bad night (4739)
• Favorite

  (575): View more from New Mexico

  is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?

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  (575): is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song? http://tfl.nu/y2bo
  Replies (63) Good night (3698) Bad night (1107)
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  (765): View more from Indiana

  Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.

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  (765): Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack. http://tfl.nu/n2jf
  Replies (6) Good night (898) Bad night (2005)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart

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  (484): judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart http://tfl.nu/l5ge
  Replies (2) Good night (2307) Bad night (800)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?

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  (908): do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants? http://tfl.nu/rdvq
  Replies (9) Good night (2772) Bad night (1026)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life

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  (412): Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life http://tfl.nu/5boh
  Replies (6) Good night (2838) Bad night (1412)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick

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  (850): that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick http://tfl.nu/ww0j
  Replies (11) Good night (3884) Bad night (711)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form

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  (412): i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form http://tfl.nu/n72m
  Replies (17) Good night (2110) Bad night (894)
• Favorite

  (719): View more from Colorado

  hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.

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  (719): hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year. http://tfl.nu/9tpx
  Replies (3) Good night (1373) Bad night (565)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.

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  (702): See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first. http://tfl.nu/1rv0
  Replies (9) Good night (1639) Bad night (674)
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.

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  (415): It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms. http://tfl.nu/erk3
  Replies (9) Good night (1893) Bad night (348)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Why am I feeling up grandma?!

  (312): View more from Illinois

  I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.

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  (248): Why am I feeling up grandma?! (312): I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text. http://tfl.nu/znfl
  Replies (2) Good night (1272) Bad night (481)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars

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  (515): i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars http://tfl.nu/h89f
  Replies (5) Good night (561) Bad night (265)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.

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  (505): A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk. http://tfl.nu/nmzj
  Replies (1) Good night (593) Bad night (416)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  The entire state will know me by my boobs.

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  (304): The entire state will know me by my boobs. http://tfl.nu/8hqf
  Replies (3) Good night (488) Bad night (229)

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