i don't like sucking hair
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
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