I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
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