Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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