tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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