Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
