Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!