Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.