sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
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