I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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