I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
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