Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
The struggles of a small town man whore
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
