You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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