i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
