I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I will pee on everything he values.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
