TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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