I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
