Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
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Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
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My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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