i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
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