A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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