thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
