Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Randomize
