she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
is it fun? or sober?
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