Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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