If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
