And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Then you guys just all showered together...?
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize
