I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Randomize
