I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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