Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
