That's intense
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
