lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize