let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize