I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I have aggressive nipples.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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