"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Randomize
