Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize
