You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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