So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
farters have to be the big spoon...
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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