i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
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