if i can run in heels then i can drive
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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