Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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