we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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