: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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