They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
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